Move Away from the Mouse

​   There comes a time in every single gal’s life when she realizes online dating is not working and she has lost her way.  Here are some sure signs you need to back away from the laptop:

• Your dating website has a section showing the top 25 women’s profile pictures.   One day, to your surprise, you find your picture at number 22.  You carefully study the more highly rated photographs for characteristics making them superior to your own.  You switch to a more provocative shot and, to your great satisfaction, shoot up a couple spots.  You continue working your way up the profile hierarchy proudly proclaiming your progress to your high fiving friends.  Messages arrive from potential suitors and you blow them off to study the number 1 profile photo and strategize.

• Some internet dating guy messages “you are on here all the time.”  You respond he must also be “on here all the time” to know you are “on here all the time”.  The two of you get in an all-out dating site routine rumble until he finally blocks you.

• A dude shows interest and, to your glee, his profile picture exhibits his assets sheathed in a loin cloth.  Your first thought:  I have to show my friends!  There are hoots of laughter and surprise and he becomes your new “go to” ice breaker at parties. 

​

• You become the morality police and take great pleasure in telling separated men YOU don’t date guys who are still married.

​

• A potential suitor proudly drops a famous friend’s name in his profile. You take a little too much joy in haughtily telling him you are not interested and to say hello to his superstar friend.  No name-droppers on your watch.

​   Yep, you have definitely lost your way.  You’re a cynical dating survivalist, holed up with your laptop, setting your sights on potential red flags and warding off suitors with your paranoia.

​    Maybe it’s time to power off and hit the bars again.