Here is my article for the UK website Singles Warehouse :
With recent political events, I’m not sure any citizens from the British monarchy are listening to the colonies anymore but after paging through 1000s of American dating profile pictures, I do have a couple pieces of advice. Hopefully, this information will bring more romance and harmony to the British Isles.
2. Clear body parts, other than your own, from the photo.
3. Think carefully regarding your largest asset.
4. Hunter-gatherers are so passé.
5. Just put the Sharpie® away
I’m hoping this assists you in selecting the perfect dating profile picture. As you can see, the States have a way to go.
P.S. P.J. thanks for your ideas! I'm on it!
Last year, I talked my friend into crashing a party. We heard all this great music and laughing and did not want to miss out. Unfortunately, it did not go well. Mortification has blocked some of my memory but there was confrontation, outrage, and kicking-out involved. Looking back, we should have grabbed a bottle of wine, offered it to the hostess, and said the party sounded like a lot of fun and to enjoy the wine with our compliments. We might have been invited to join in the festivities. Invitation or not, it would have been a classy way to handle the situation and is exactly what I will do next time. You, dear reader, may use this graceful option for any of your upcoming party-crashing opportunities.
Upon returning, tails between our legs, my friend’s husband was shocked by our new party crasher status and even more shocked I was the instigator. I was chastened but also a little proud of us. We did not stay home listening to all those people having a good time. We put on our party pants and went for it! Of course, we went down in flames but we STILL went for it!
In the same vein, my overarching goal for 2017 is to be more bold. I know a life well-lived requires one to be courageous and I am ready for the challenge. I aspire to tackle one fear-inducing activity each week and blog about it. I’m going to talk to that guy at Peet’s. I’m going to go to that event by myself. And finally, I’m going to crash that party… but this time with a bottle of wine. You, dear reader, can learn from my mistakes and forge your own courageous path. Together we can lead emboldened, richer, opportunity-filled and more productive lives because we decided to be brave.
Happy No Fears!
P.S. Click on the Happy No Fears image for the downloadable PDF.
In Gillian Flynn’s bestselling novel Gone Girl, the protagonist
talks about being the “cool chick”. She wants her man to fall in love with her so she denies her own aspirations and desires to become his dream girl. As a result, she gets the guy but compromises her soul in the process.
Here is the BIG problem: Not only is the “cool chick” setting up unrealistic expectations for her relationship, she also is doing it for the rest of us. Men see these idealized women and start expecting everyone to behave accordingly. Those of us who would like honest, authentic relationships cannot be ourselves and cool at the same time and thus begins the frustration.
Unfortunately, there are plenty of you “cool chicks” out there! You know who you are, but if you’re in total denial, here is a list of some of your “cool chick” moves:
STOP IT RIGHT NOW! Not only are you swimming in a huge vat of Not Happy, you are forcing the rest of us to swim with you. By you compromising yourself, you are sending a message to all men that this is what women do. They expect it of the rest of us and we are SICK OF IT.
So, what do us non-cool chicks do? Perhaps we should unionize and come up with a conduct contract declaring a boycott on cool chick-ery. None of us put down our gender. None of us sell our soul for a relationship and none of us become someone we are not. Of course, there will be scabs among us and we will need to figure out a relevant way to deal with their actions. Perhaps, it is enough to live a life of inauthentic relationships, acting like someone else, and the consequences of those “cool chick” choices.
Excerpt from The Spinster's Guide to Dating